Layla Jade's Birth Story

As with the theme of the remainder of your life, your story begins with your brothers.  Also, since I did not write one of these for either of your brothers, I have to tell their condensed stories first…

Dominic was born via c-section at a hospital and I initially thought my disappointment with that situation was part of post-partum.  I was so defeated in my body and felt like a failure.  Fast forward two years when I was pregnant with your brother Jackson, I was dreading walking back into the operating room bending over,  getting a spinal and being cut-open again.  The more I thought about it the more it made me sick to my stomach.  I came across a documentary, The Business of Being Born and thought; maybe I could have a vaginal birth.  I spoke with my doctor and they said it was not up to me, it was up to them. 

I immediately knew that did not seem right and decided to get a second and third opinion.  Upon review from the midwives at the birth center and a midwife at a different OB/GYN practice it was determined I was a great candidate for a VBAC.

Your brother’s birth was again not what I expected.  I of course had a vision in my head and it was much different than I thought.  With him I had 2-1/2 days of “practice” contractions before the real deal began.  All of the anticipation and excitement to meet him, followed by lack of progression, started to wear me out.  Progression finally began and we decided to go in pretty early in the morning of the 27^th.  I ended up having 12hrs of active labor and 45min of pushing.  He (whom we did not know was a he at the time) came out with his hand up and his pinky nail cut me.  I did a lot of fighting the contractions by wasting energy on not embracing what was happening.  Once I got past the self doubt sign post, I remember an overwhelming sense that I was finally getting this and I could do it.  Once pushing began I distinctly remember the feeling of birthing my baby.  Daddy was able to catch him in the tub and he was put on my chest.  We found out that he was a he and I remember wanting to hold him forever.  The midwives knew something was not quite right and they moved me out of the tub to the bed.  I delivered the placenta and had some heavy bleeding so they gave me shot of pitocin to get my uterus to clamp down.  Luckily they knew what they were doing, it worked like a charm and my color started coming back.

Again, fast forward two years, your dad and I decided that we wanted to try for a girl.  I really had to determine for myself if I was ready to go through a weekend of labor and heavy bleeding and potentially being cut again.  When I really reflected upon it, I realized, I was able to overcome all of it.  I was making it to be too big of a deal in my head.

We found out at the 20 week ultrasound that we had accomplished our goal.  This was the first time out of all three of you that we had found out what “type” we were having.  I had been voicing my concerns all along to the midwives about your labor.  They assured me that since this was my “second” labor and delivery, things would go much different.  My body knew what to do as long as I shut my mind up and let it happen.

So this time around when “labor” began, I assumed it was just practice and it was not a big deal when it stopped.  On early Monday morning I had contractions and they were pretty intense so I decided to stay home from work.  At around noon that day, they had completely stopped.  I took it in stride and decided to just be thankful for an unusual day home with your brothers.  That night labor began again and I was up off and on, but it stopped and I decided to work that day.  I had an appointment at the birth center and they told me to try eggplant.  I really wanted to see you so we decided to go to Olive Garden for dinner to see if we could get things to progress.  I had numerous contractions during dinner and beyond.  We put your brothers to bed and told your grandma and grandpa to keep the phone near them.  I tried to lie down but it was not comfortable so I walked on the treadmill and when I realized this was indeed the real thing I did nearly everything to keep things progressing.  I would sweep the house and walk through the contractions.  Then my mucus plug passed and I questioned just how far along I was. 

Your dad assured me things were progressing and he made a pot of coffee.  He insisted we call your grandparents; better to have them there then not at all.  I changed our sheets and packed the car.  Right when they arrived, the self doubt sign post arrived as well.  I doubted the self-doubt.   They assured me I was progressing and it was time to go to the birth center.

We arrived early in the morning, around 3:30am.  After we arrived I asked them to tell me how far I was progressed.  I was sure I was far along because with your brother I was at 8 cm and it took a long time to complete and start pushing.  When she said I was at 5cm I was devastated.  I overcame my frustration since I knew that was what hindered me last time.  I also knew I wasted a ton of energy with your brother by screaming and fighting it.  So I embraced what was happening. I continued to walk around and Daddy took some well-needed rest.  I also tried every birth aid the center has, the birthing stool, the toilet, the ball.  We had the radio going and changed it from the Bob and Tom show to music, so I would have no clue how much time had passed.  I started to have back labor and then Audra suggested I get into the tub.  I did not want to because, in the one birth class we went to this time around, they indicated it tends to slow labor down.  She said not to worry I am way past that.  She also suggested to try and get you to flip off back labor we try 3-3-3, where you do 3 contractions on your left side, 3 on all fours and 3 on your right side.  I did the first 3 on the left side, turned to all fours and on the first contraction I pushed, but did not tell anyone.  Daddy was at the base of the tub and all I remember is a contraction started and something overcame me and I pushed you out all in one push. 

Daddy and Audra were shocked.  One second, there was nothing and the next there you were!  I looked down and saw you, passed you under my leg and pulled you up on my chest.  This time they shot me right up with the pitocin.  I birthed the placenta and got out of the tub.  We snuggled in the bed all three of us, just amazed that we had our little girl.  You were born at 9am and were only 7lbs 12oz (your brothers both weighed in at 9lbs 6oz).  Your brothers and grandparents visited at around noon after Dominic was out of pre-school.  They were so excited to see you and wanted to hold you.  Your Namma and Aunt Lindsay came to visit also.  You did really well nursing and had such a wonderful herbal bath.  We packed up and headed home and were back in Mommy and Daddy’s bed snuggled up by 3:30pm.

Our family is now complete, you’re Daddy’s little girl and your brothers' pride and joy.  For me, you’re my buddy, we will have many years of banding together against the boys.  Your birth also helped complete my vision of a real labor and delivery.  It was your labor that solidified my ability to give birth naturally.  I will share this information of birth and nursing along to you, so you too may feel complete.

Love Mom.